Thursday, February 14, 2013

No second chance

I'm cold and hungry and exhausted and I just got a refusal e-mail from a job application.
So I feel like shit.

I'm really, really fed up with my current job. It was good at the beginning, but after several reorganisations and especially with new bosses, it's just torture. I dislike my team leader, I feel exploited, our departement leader is absolutely not qualified. My new team mates are an incredibly stupid and confused girl who can do nothing on her own and opportunist who thinks of everything as "funny" but has a bad taste in jokes. My team leader's not qualified for leadership (and doesn't do any), likes to spend a lot of time on making things pretty, but none on testing functionality and is very good at delegating unpleasant duties. I don't fit into this team anymore.
The only thing I see ahead of me for the next year or so is testing the same thing over and over again (for various reasons); stupid, repetetive work. A waste of my qualifications.
Plus I question a few strategic choices of the management - I am not sure this company will last a few years longer.
From these "10 Signs That It's Time To Leave Your Job" at least 7 apply to my situation.
So I really want to leave there. As soon as possible.

But I don't really want to move.
Finding jobs in my field here is difficult.

I applied at fours jobs so far. And got two refusals. They didn't even invite me to an interview.
I really thought I was qualified for that job. I must have done something wrong. Was the covering letter bad? Am I not as qualified as I thought? Did I want too much money (we could have talked about that)?
In job applications there's only one chance and you never get to know what you did wrong, you never get the chance to do it better next time. There is no next time.

It's really wearing me out. I wonder how much longer I can last.

Well, I guess I'll get something to eat now, turn up the heating and watch some anime or read Natsume's Book of Friends or something.
And maybe I'll feel better afterwards and ready for another day at my crappy job.

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