Sunday, June 24, 2012

How to find friends - not

I got anothe rone of these newsletters: "Finding Friends".

So what tipps do they give?
- Visit events that make you talk to other people, e.g. flea markets.
- Talk with random people on the street, e.g. don't bring a watch and ask people what time it is.
- Do smalltalk. Like talking about the weather.
- Don't be hard to approach, look people in the eye.
- Invite acquaintences to something.

I wonder do these people ever read what they wrote? It's so obviously written by someone who never had to try to find friends. Flea markets? Seriously? And how many have ever made a best friend by asking what time it is?
People complain that nowadays you can make friends online by clicking on a button - and they claim they're not really friends. Yeah, but the person you talked with on a flea market counts as a friend? Why do people think that the medium plays such a big role (and face-to-face is superior per se) and not the content or the value?

Why don't they understand that "friend-less" people are not all so shy that they can't talk to anyone?
I've been in many yoga courses - I never made a friend there. I've met people at concerts (some even repeatedly) and chatted with them - none of them are my friends. Just recently I talked with an elderly woman on a packed train about where she lives and where I live and about the train service - but we'll never be friends.

I'm afraid that the further you stray away from the mainstream, the harder it is to find like-minded people.
But the mainstream won't understand that.

1 comment:

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